On the train to St. Jean Pied de Port

On the train to St. Jean we sat with a nice young woman from Nice who is on her way to a design competition. Then a woman, my age and her grand daughter who joined us from Germany Were carrying backpacks. It turns out That They are on their way to walk the Camino. The mother said she will not begin in St. Jean. Likewise she feels like she packed to much. She does not know if she will walk the full way Because she does not know if she can. I certainly understand. My pack weights 17 pounds. I wanted it to weigh 12 pounds, but can not figure out what I should leave behind.

We just left the Bordeaux train station. We are now in wine country. The French countryside is pretty with rolling hills, farmland, and deciduous trees.  Most of the houses are light colored stucco with red clay roofs like in Mexico.

Something that surprises me is the graffiti and tagging on buildings, subways and even under bridges in southern France.  I thought this was an American thing, now I am curious as to where it started.

After a few hours on the train I sat next to two women. They came with backpacks. They are from Germany. Changing trains in Bayonne. We looked around and there are people all around us with backpacks. We met a lively woman from Australia and 1 other man from Germany. The train we boarded to go to St. Jean was only 1 very large modern rail car, filled with all of us filled with the anticipation of starting our Camino. After less than an hours ride we all got off and got on a bus. There were 45 of us. The ride was beautiful ascending up into the Pyrenees, with lush ground cover, trees and a river. Arriving in St John was like a dream. We followed the pilgrim shells to the passport office to get our passport. When we arrived it was closed and would reopen in  another 30 minutes. It was now 7:30 pm. We looked for an abergue to stay for the night.  We came to the last one and the woman there had no rooms left but was calling to find beds for a German couple and then began looking for us. In the meantime another Austrian man joined us. Finally after 40 minutes of her looking she sent us off to the pilgrims office to see about getting a taxi to the next town. When we arrived there were 14 of us without beds. They got us registered quickly, called a taxi and half of the group took off for an albergue up the mountain. The other half of us waited another 30 minutes for the van to return. We were left with our German and Austrian friends. The driver spoke Spanish and Angie turned out to be our interpreter. We arrived at 10:00 PM in Valcarlos having had no dinner. We went for tapas with out friend from Austria and returned back just before midnight to spend the night on the top bunk in a room with 20 other pilgrims and a shared co-ed bathroom to the tune of soft snoring, tossing and turning and and an occassional gasp and gag. :)

August 31, 2014

Today is the first day of our walk on the Camino.  It has been such a challenge  to get a WiFi connection.  Tonight again I cannot access WiFi on my phone, but the albergue/hostel has computers with internet. The cost is 2 Euros to connect and it has taken me 10 minutes of my 15 to logon and so I will type fast. As soon as possible I will add text from the last few days.

It has been a wonderful journey, but with a few challenges.  There was no where to stay in Saint Jean last night and so we had to go by taxi with 7 others to Valcarlos, 8 kilometers away.  So then we walked through the Pyrenees today instead of over them.  It was absolutely gorgeous with very high green mountains and pristine water falls.  It was also the hardest hike I have ever taken.  We hiked mostly uphill for 6 hours today with 19 pound backpacks.  My heart was pounding and despite the beauty I had to wonder, if I am truly up for this.  The last couple hours my legs felt very weak and I could only walk a short ways and then continue.  I thought we would never stop hiking up the mountain.  Along the way we only saw one other person.  Most of the time we were in gorgeous wooded areas with song birds, ferns, dense trees and black berries.  Thank God for the blackberries.  I would stop and eat a few as I walked.  They were a wonderful distraction from the challenge of the climb.  They reminded me that the joy is in the small moments of the journey and not in the destination.

We arrived at a beautiful 200 bed hostel which is very new.  We are sleeping  in a 4 bunk bed cubicle with young men who do not speak English and I have not found out where they are from yet.  I went to the Pilgrims mass in a lovely church next to the hostel and we ate a wonderful Pilgrims dinner with 8 others at our table at the hostel.  The food was delicious: trout, potatoes, potato soup and ice cream bars for dinner.  I met 4 Germans.  One of the gentlemen has been walking from his home in Germany since the end of May and will continue walking on to Santiago.

I  am grateful we survived the first day, and blessed by extreme beauty, wonderful people from all over the world and a comfortable bed to sleep on.  

Paris

We arrived in Paris on Wednesday afternoon about 4:30 p.m. All was well except for a delayed flight out of Amsterdam. We sat on the plane next to a man from Paris who spends three weeks every summer in Portland with his wife, daughter, and in-laws. He was very friendly and helpful. 

We took the train into Paris, which was a little disturbing.  It felt more like Oakland than our idea of Paris.  Getting off the train in Paris without backpacks was more scary.  At first, we could not figure out how to get out of the subway, but when we did get out, there were lots of men loitering on the streets who appeared to be from the Middle East or North Africa.  We had to wander for at least 45 minutes before finding our hotel which was fine once inside. The only thing is that the elevator was broken and we had to lug our backpacks up 5 flights of stairs.  Good training for the Camino, huh?

Then we found that I could not access Wi-Fi with my iPhone, but Angie could pick up messaging. This is why you saw no posts until today.

We did have a great time in Paris and completely enjoyed the people. Everyone was very friendly and helpful.  We made a point of seeing the Mona Lisa at the Louvre as well as having a Guinness and fish and chips at an Irish bar. :)

We are now on our way to St. Jean Pied de Port by train from Paris.  It will take us about 7 hours.  There we begin our Camino.  We are a bit anxious, not knowing if we will find a place to stay and, more importantly, answering the question if we are up to this.  Our feet are already sore from finding and connecting to all the right trains!

Sermon at St. Stephen's Episcopal Church, Boise, Idaho

Sermon preached by Eileen at St. Stephan's Episcopal Church, Boise, Idaho, August 2014

Walk-On

In just 3 days, I will fly out of Boise on my way to Spain, to walk the Camino de Santiago de Compostela, a 500 mile pilgrimage. This seems like a crazy thing to do for a woman who has had a desk-job for the past 17 years, who is quickly approaching 60, and who would rather be laying in the sun reading a good book then walking in the hot sun and feeling the sweat creep down her back under a most burdensome backpack.  A friend of mine asked me the other night, couldn’t you just take a nice walk on the beach on a warm Caribbean Island: resting to have a fruity drink with a pretty little umbrella and breathe in the gorgeous view.  Well no, apparently not.

A few years ago I was sitting here in the pew at St. Stephen’s Episcopal church listening to our new Canon for Ministry, Lucinda tell about her spiritual journey in walking the Camino de Santiago de Compostela and I said, “I have to do that”.  Immediately following the service we went to find the movie “The Way”, and I knew I had to walk the Camino.  Now, it does not make one bit of sense for me to do this.  I don’t take long walks and I don’t backpack.  I don’t leave home for 40 days.  I don’t do these things! I work! I serve people with disabilities and I take care of my family.

But…the Holy Spirit, she is sneaky.  There is this calling, calling, calling…  Get back on the path…walk...walk the Camino.

Let me give you a bit of history. About 15 years ago my husband Doug wrote an article for the magazine Diaconeo.  The article was published. It was called “I Married a Deacon”.  It is a beautiful story, relating how Doug and I met in the formation for ministry process and how we were ordained together, he a priest and me a deacon just 6 months after we were married.  Our whole life together has centered on our ministry.  He relates in the article how when we entered the ministry we were so filled with hope, passion and love.  We were determined to change the world, working for justice for all people. We might have been just a little overzealous.    My best friend’s family lovingly (at least I think so) referred to me as an RN, Religious Nut.  We worked tirelessly in the church and in the community.  Bishop John Thornton once said that the work could be seductive, you just don’t want to stop.  And wow, that was true for us and then things changed.

Things in the church changed, we changed, we lost my mom, almost lost my daughter and grandson and Doug was diagnosed with MS.  The one thing Doug always had was boundless energy and we fed each other with that mutual energy for mission.  Things fell apart, unraveled so quickly.  This of course was not the first time difficult things had happened in our lives; we have suffered through many things.  The death of siblings, parents, illness, loss of Doug’s daughter, financial strains, divorce, single parenthood…  But this loss was a wound to our soul.

Suddenly we came up short, we were at a loss, the church that had surrounded us was not there and we were coping with a really big demon at a time when our personal reserves were very low.  The life we were building was being changed forever.  The path forward became blurry we lost the voice in our hearts that called us to ministry each day.  We were lost.  We drifted for a long time, our faith in our church, in our God and each other faltered.  It was the dark night of the soul.

But God does not leave us there, I know this and I experienced this. God keeps calling, even when we plug our ears and turn away in distrust.  Slowly, ever so slowly, we began to hear again. I listened to Lucinda’s sermon, I reflected on the Diocesan Motto a couple of years ago, “To Take the Next Right Step”, and I listened to an interview of a man that decided to spend a year of “just saying yes” to new opportunities.  And so I said, this year I will say YES.  My mantra will be “Take the Next Right Step.  Rev. Alice Farquhar-Mayes gave me the saying:  Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass; it is about learning to dance in the rain.  And so last year, when Fr. Dave asked me to Deacon I said YES.  When Tobi asked me to be the Spiritual Director for Women’s Camp, I said YES.  The Holy Spirit kept whispering, Camino de Santiago, Camino de Santiago, Camino de Santiago.  And I said YES!

But wait, the one person I have journeyed with for the past 20 years cannot walk, cannot walk with me.  We have always walked together on this spiritual journey; I don’t want to go alone, more importantly I don’t want to leave Doug behind.  This has been our ministry.

In April we walked/strolled with the scooter the MS walk, a fundraiser for MS and I heard the answer.  I will walk this journey with Doug and for Doug.  I will carry him and all people who suffer from autoimmune diseases in my prayers and in my steps.  I will pray for healing.  I will walk for those who cannot.  I will keep a blog and ask those who read it to consider donating and praying with me for those who suffer from autoimmune diseases.  You see my son in law, whom I love dearly, has lupus. I will pray for him. My daughter will walk with me.  We will walk because we can walk.

I invite all of you to listen to the Spirit, to say YES, to walk your own Camino, your own spiritual path.  You see through all this I have learned and relearned.  God is with us.  We each have a path, the path may be long, it may difficult but it is worth the journey.  Walk-On! Enjoy this journey, this path that lies before you.  We all have a path that is unique to us: hilly, bumpy, steep, smooth and unpredictable, but your life has a purpose. God has a purpose, a path for you. Find it!  Listen for it.  Trust in God. 

Palm 130:5, I wait for the LORD, my soul waits and in his word I hope.

Preparation for the journey.

About 6 months ago I announced that I was going to walk the Camino de Santiago.  I hoped and prayed I would be able to do this in the fall of 2014.  I knew though that there were alot of variables that would need to align for me to do this.  First, I would need to be able to get away from work, secondly Doug would need to be well enough for me to go and lastly I would need to be able to afford it.  Well things have aligned.  I decided to retire, having reached the rule of 90 in the fall and work half-time.  Luckily our superintendent, Wendy Johnson, allowed me to do this.  Doug is fairly stable with his MS right now, and we have many friends and family who said they would be there to support him.  And luckily, I have been able to scrape together the money.

Doug was very worried about me going alone and asked my daughter Angie if she would go with me.  She was a bit hesitant, having a busy life of her own with 2 children and a husband, but she really wanted to go.  Her husband Tom was completely supportive.  And so, she said yes, much to Doug's relief and to my joy.  An added benefit to Angie going is that Angie speaks Spanish and a bit of French. Lucky me!  I am delighted that we will be able to share this time.

It has taken a lot of work to get ready to walk the Camino.  Not only have I had to get the house ready for me to leave, I also needed to get things done at work for school to start and to walk and walk and walk to prepare for this 500 mile walk.  I have told people that I have been walking the Camino de Nampa and the Camino de Cascade always with my faithful and lovable dog Styder and sometimes with Doug and my sister Kate. Along the path in Nampa I have met many friends who have encouraged me along the way and provide me helpful tips to support my training.  I am thankful for all them especially on the days when my back, legs and feet were stiff and achy and I would rather have curled into bed for another couple hours.